Synergy Personal Development

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Everyone wants to be happy, but happiness eludes those who chase it tirelessly

How you define fulfilling is probably different from the way I do. The pursuit of a life of relevance takes on a variety of meanings depending on who you talk to. One thing is certain: to be fulfilled we need to be balanced.

If you have money but no love, you will feel a void in your life. Likewise, attending religious services every week but not living the life you hear about will leave you feeling poor as well.

Therefore, you need balance; a way to put the four corners of your best self on the table and manifest a fulfilling life. Those four corners are mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional well-being. Let’s look at each corner in more detail, and the benefits of enriching these areas as often as possible:

Mental Well-Being

Are you reading, studying, or teaching? All of these activities contribute to an enhanced state of mental well-being. 

In his book, The Morning Miracle, Hal Elrod discusses the importance of starting your day with some reading. Did you know that if you read 10 pages a day, you would read the equivalent of approximately 14 books a year? That would be quite an accomplishment, wouldn’t it? Consider the amount of knowledge you would gain from those dozen-plus books. Little by little, you’d become a mental giant.

I’ve seen it over and over again with seniors: once they give in to sitting in that chair and watching TV all day long, their world shrinks and their mental clarity begins to decline. However, the opposite can also true. My retiree-students have minds as sharp as tacks because they continue to learn. What would you like to learn? Nothing is stopping you from doing so.

Teaching is another way to improve your mental well-being. When you learn to teach, you need to have a more holistic understanding of the topic. After all, no one sees things the way you do. So you need to consider how to explain the topic from a different paradigm. You’ll need to use different words and examples to ensure the person you are imparting knowledge to gains from the value of your experience. What subject matter could you share with the world? From cooking to coding, others are waiting to benefit from your wealth of knowledge. 

And you would be benefitting from sharing what you know with others, too.

We are either growing or dying.

Physical Well-Being

How often do we sit at our desks all day, then situate ourselves comfortably in the car for the ride home? Once home, we plop down at the dinner table for a hearty meal before lounging in our favorite chair and wind up the day by heading off to bed. I hope I am more guilty of this than you, But I think you get the point; exercise eludes us.

How differently we would feel if we took a walk at lunchtime, and started or ended the working day with some more rigorous exercise. There are countless benefits to both physical and mental health from exercise that go beyond the loss of pounds and the discovery of muscle. Exercise gets the blood pumping, releasing feel-good hormones, endorphins, that improve moods, reduce stress, and strengthen the heart as well. 

The American Heart Association recommends getting at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise or 75 minutes of vigorously intensive aerobic activity per week. That is roughly 30 minutes a day of movement five days a week. 

It is really not a lot of motion. A few fast-paced walks, a few days of strength training, or playing a sport will have your heart playing a happier tune.

Emotional Well-Being

Are you happy or sad; frustrated or gratified? Your emotions play a big part in not only how you see the world, but also the way you interact with it. I had a discussion with my friend that exemplifies these points:

Me: I’ve noticed recently that you have stopped communicating. You seem kind of cold and distant. Are you ok? I 

Friend: Really? It seems like YOU ARE the one that is being aloof.

Me: Do you remember that I texted you every day this week to check up on you? And I was the one who suggested we go out tonight? So what’s eating at you?

Friend: Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m really stressed about my job. I don’t feel like the quality of my work is adequate.

Me: Yeah, I can see how those thoughts could be overwhelming. How can I help?

My friend did not realize that they were projecting their own distancing thoughts onto me. This is true with many of us. We see in others what is inside of ourselves. To improve you need a path to overcoming that.

One route is to be more aware of your emotions and the causes of those. For example, in the iPhone health app there is a feature called State of Mind. It helps you track your moods and emotions by asking how you feel, and requesting that you identify the emotions and situations that contribute to your mood. Enhanced awareness and tracking of emotions will allow you to see them at face value. Then, you can evaluate how to be better at managing your moods and the way you process emotions. Here are some other emotion-tracking apps.

You don’t need a fancy gadget to track your emotions, you could also jot them down in a journal or memo, capturing your state at any given moment. Allowing you to better understand yourself and the factors that lead to the way you interact with your surroundings. This tool will help you enhance your understanding of emotions.

Spiritual Well-Being

When we hear ‘spiritual’ often our minds go directly to organized religion. You don’t need to go to church or mosque to enhance your spiritual well-being. In fact, spirituality and religion are completely different things, and we are focused on spirituality – your connection to what lies beyond the visual, the supernatural, wherever you get that.

Some find spirituality in connection to the creator, others in nature, and still more in understanding themselves more deeply through meditation, chakra alignment, and/or journaling. Whichever way you choose to enrich your soul will enhance your life.

Here are some other ways to improve your spiritual well-being.

Meditate on a quote

Whether the quote is tied to some sacred text, a stoic philosopher, a poem, a line from a song or a movie; spend some time pondering what that inspirational text means to you. This is a powerful introspective exercise.

Get out in nature and listen

Whether in the park, the forest, or on the beach; getting out in nature and taking in the surroundings puts you in touch with the world around you. It balances and calms you while strengthening your connection to your environment.

he benefits of consistency

Consistency is the greatest factor in driving you towards what you become. By working on your well-being in all four of these areas, mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual; over time you will find your life becoming more fulfilling. You will have a greater sense of mental agility and life will become more fluid. In fact, raising one corner of the table lifts them all. .

It's not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives. It's what we do consistently

What’s next?

Select some activities that will contribute to your mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual growth. Write these down in a place where you can easily refer to them later. Then, commit to doing the activities a few times a week. After you complete each task, put a checkmark next to it. And, at the end of the week review your list, tallying your totals.

  • Did you work on all four areas? 
  • Which are lagging? 
  • Changing out activities that you did not do or have become bored of.
  • Think about how you feel at the end of an activity and at the end of the week.
  • Do you feel more in control?
  • Are you calmer?
  • Do you have an increased sense of confidence?


If you answered yes to any of the questions, you are on the path to a more fulfilling life. If your answers to these questions were not satisfactory for you. Why not book a free 30-minute consultation with me (see the big orange bubble above) ? I’m here to help you become a better version of yourself.

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